Doggonit, my Doggone Life

Smile
Smile

My life has gone to the dogs. Well, I guess it’s been that way for a while. Now that I really think about it, my entire marriage for starters! We’ve always had dogs, generally two or three at a time. They get old, and slow down, and we love them for their personalities, character, that sweet and gentle way they place a head in your lap, and give a kiss. Then, we’ve had puppies and woefully say, “This too shall pass.”

This is where we are right now – two slightly older girls ranging from 2-3.5 years old, in human years they should be in their early 20s. They still like to chew, wrestle, play pretty hard, and destroy plants. I’m not sure I know too many 20-year-olds that like to do that, but okay. And then there is this 10-month-old…monster? Seems that’s been the word of the day for me this past week.

Randy was out of town for six days – lucky guy – and I stayed here with the pups. Brooks, our 10-month old Dalmatian realized pretty darn quickly that I’m not his daddy, and I’m no alpha. Really? Did anyone out there ever think I was an alpha? Brooks decided to go on a holy terror spree and drive me crazy. Starting with the wall in the upstairs hallway. He chewed a hole right into it. So, yes, I was upset but proceeded to show my own handyman skills and purchased some drywall compound and got to work. I even added the texture inherent in the original wall (this house is vintage 1978). Later I’m sitting at the bar (no, not a real bar unfortunately, my kitchen bar…should have been the corner bar down the street) and what do I hear…chewing. In the same #$@% spot! So, with everything I could muster I pulled that heavy 60lb puppy (8 year old child if you do the dog-to-human calculator) up those stairs and in my deepest, strongest, meanest voice I could muster I said, “NO!” and he trotted off wagging his tail. (My PPCC students are currently sending out LMAO texts at the very moment of reading this – deepest, strongest, meanest voice…yea, right!)

Really, wagging the tail? Can’t you at least bow your head in shame and give me that? Just a moment of surmised authority, a momentary glimpse of alpha status? Nope, on to the kitchen, lapped up a bit of water and out the back door to find something else to destroy.

Chicken Head
Chicken Head

Here’s a little more of that doggie destruction, but this is “okay destruction.” That’s what toys are for, right? I’ve collected this wonderful arrangement of heads. Yes, heads that no longer have their cute, cuddly, stuffed, colorful bodies. Sometimes, every bit of stuffing removed to just a flattened shell of a once squishy cartoon character. Or, just the crown of a once tall, proud, rubber chicken that wore a cool leather jacket! I even have the head of a snake from a toy maker that made the “indestructible dog toys” list. So, what does one do with such a collection? Why, a photography project of course! You knew I’d get around to photography at some point in all this. Consider a fun, off-the-wall project that allows you to cut loose and play. I loved the new texture of our freshly concreted driveway, and the beautiful mottled light coming through the trees on a sunny afternoon. Each time the wind blew the tree branches; it looked like a moving stage spotlight! Too much fun!

And, to the dog toy makers out there, if you want to test your toys and ensure they make the indestructible list, send them to my house. We’ll decide if they get that honor. I don’t think so!

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